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Naughtypursuit 56F  
2766 posts
7/23/2018 12:46 pm

So sorry for your loss. You should not feel guilty for the time you spent on here. You found something that gave you an escape which allowed you to take better care of your husband. Its important that you reach out so that you dont get too depressed, either on here, family and friends and your doctor. Take care


lust4life59 65F  
2552 posts
7/23/2018 12:51 pm

I do know what it is like to care for someone, someone I loved and depended on for love and affection. I think no matter the circumstances, guilt, anger, and sadness, are all part of the grieving process. If coming on here is part of your guilt, be assured that taking care of your own needs is one of the most important things you could have done as a caregiver. I'm sorry for your loss, hold on to those furbabies, they help more than you can imagine, not sure what I would have done without mine after my husband passed. N


CisandTGirl 47M/48F

7/23/2018 12:51 pm

Sorry to hear about your loss. In the end and the whole time you were a caregiver your husband knew you loved him. As it shows from all the support you got from family, friends and even his doctor. Please don't feel guilty about being here. You are a loving, caring wife. I use present tense terms because just because he is gone it doesn't mean your aren't a wife still.


thinksmiles1 66M/67F
1352 posts
7/23/2018 1:01 pm

Our deepest sympathy.


thinkingofyou12 67M
4690 posts
7/23/2018 1:18 pm

my condolences.

I've been a care giver to two terminally ill family members. I always cherish the time I had with them but still feel their loss everyday.


Jus4lafs 58M

7/23/2018 1:38 pm

Very sorry for your loss. Find a grief group and start living for yourself. You will be happy again!


mamilCork 52M
5 posts
7/23/2018 1:40 pm

So sorry to hear your news. Take care of yourself over the coming weeks and months.


sokkerfan 73M
7 posts
7/23/2018 2:38 pm

Vicki, I am so saddened to hear about the passing of your spouse. I went through the same thing last Easter and it still can bring my day to a stand still if something reminds me that I no longer have that rock to fall back on. You are to be commended for taking care of your husband for so long. I was fortunate that my wife's passing was quick. It was only six weeks from the initial diagnosis until we had her home in hospice for the last two weeks. If you ever need to vent, or just let go, you know you can always text me or call and we can chat. I will always fondly remember having lunch with you in Delaware and sharing a beer. If and when you are able or ready to return to the dating scene I would love to say hi again. Maybe an evening at the Kennedy Center in six weeks. I was able to score tickets to Hamilton in September. Maybe you'll be ready by then. Jack (sokkerfan).


mc_justmc 63M

7/23/2018 3:03 pm

I'm very sorry to hear this. This is a time to be with family and friends. Take your time adjusting to everything, we'll be here if you need us.


pagancountrygirl 66F
6466 posts
7/23/2018 3:36 pm

So very sorry for your loss. I was recently thinking about you and some of your blogs I had read and wondered how you were doing.
I hope your family and friends are there for you to lean on while going through this process.

Pagan
Hmmmm....I know I left that wand around here somewhere!


umpalumpa67 57M
59 posts
7/23/2018 3:47 pm

dealt with the same thing ,, never thought i would get over it but with the help of family and friends i did, took some time , there is no quick fix keep yourself busy


oldbstrd55 67M
3292 posts
7/23/2018 6:02 pm

My deepest sympathy for you. I lost my wife last year. It was only a few years that had to care for her.


VelkutuVoom 55M
135 posts
7/23/2018 6:11 pm

Great name!


upfouriit 67M  
62 posts
7/23/2018 6:33 pm

My deepest sympathy. Keep your chin up and remember....when one door closes, another opens.


FMAOPLS 70F
27112 posts
7/23/2018 10:09 pm

I'm saddened to hear of the unexpected loss of your husband.

This may be a more difficult transition than you expected. I hope you will consider seeking out a bereavement group or counselling, should you feel the need.

Check out my profile or and become a "watcher" of my blog FMAOPLS,to learn more about me, and for intelligent, lively, smartassy and fun discussion, with a little irreverence thrown in. "Like" or comment on my photos, and I promise I'll add more. Thanks.


liczzz 61M
11 posts
7/27/2018 10:13 pm

sorry for your loss thoughts and prayers for u.


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
7/28/2018 11:33 pm

I'm so sorry for your loss and I'm sorry I didn't see your post until now. I cannot relate to being a caregiver and then loosing someone, however I can relate to the emptiness one feels when people you love are no longer there. When my wife decided to pick up the kids and leave . . . . I didn't even have dogs to comfort me . . . The emptiness and silence in the house was deafening! So . . Different . . . but yes , I can relate. Hope you find positive things in your life to keep you going! I'm not going to give you suggestions - as I'm sure you have plenty of those. . Take care !


Paulxx001 66M
22642 posts
7/28/2018 11:36 pm

If you ever want a welcoming ear to share . . . my blog has a private mail box. I'm a good listener . . .


sokkerman99 55M
153 posts
7/30/2018 5:43 am

Sorry for your loss. It's just going to take time to process and adapt. There is no substitute or quick fix, and I know you know this. But each day is a new day and new opportunity. My best to you.


PhilipStrongcock 48M

8/1/2018 12:10 am

My sincere condolences, for your loss - and that it came so abruptly. I too was a caregiver, for my father, who unexpectedly died back in December. It was a shock, and I'm still dealing with it, and it's aftermath....


peterpiper4013a 60M
206 posts
8/1/2018 2:48 pm

My heartfelt condolences to you. You are a great woman, caring for an ailing spouse isn't easy as you've said before but you did it with grace, never complaining and that is an inspiration whether you know it or not. Remember the good times and don't hesitate to reach out to those you trust and know can be your support. I know these are just words from a stranger but I hope they bring you a small measure of comfort.

Take care of your mental, emotional and physical self...you are special and I keep you in prayer!
Jazz
aka Peterpiper4013a


2Tstfulgy 67M
23 posts
8/3/2018 6:17 pm

My deepest sympathies to you for your loss.... I have a little bit of an idea what you are going thru and as such I can assure you that with strength and resolve each day will be a bit better..... Also watch out for attorneys and their billings that often do not really reflect what should be charged...... Feel free to IM me anytime if you just need someone to chat with that has too recently been thru the grief and legal process you are facing....
2Tstfulgy


scottj55555 55M
1987 posts
8/7/2018 3:31 pm

All of us know loss. Many of us have seen people needing to be taken care of and then passing on. No matter how much you know it's coming, a certain part of us is never ready for that loss. My sincere condolences to you.


leather63 60M
816 posts
8/9/2018 3:19 am

Sweetbitch my incredible friend I grieve w u the loss of ur husband I too was a caretaker for both f my grandmothers for 8 yrs. I know the stress it produces and time it consumes but I'm so very glad you gave this time to him and didn't put him in a home! That speaks volumes to the awesome special and loving woman you are and you must be blessed for your actions! My love to you as u grieve and please remember the good yrs and put away the bitter bad days. Take time u need to readjust and all your loving friends will be here supporting u!


dec47 77M
926 posts
8/13/2018 11:42 am

My deepest condolences. I, too, have experienced that caregiver roll. it is what one does when in love.

Now is the time for you to take care of you. Take the time necessary for you to be good with yourself and the world. and if the world don't like it TS.

Feel free to reach out to me any time you need and ear or a shoulder.
Wishing you the best


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